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Writer's pictureeaspenner

A Letter to the Preschool Mama on the Fence

Updated: Jul 28, 2020

Dear Sweet Mama,

Oh, how I see your precious heart being torn in two. Trudging through this life-changing decision, completely alone, in the quietest depths of your uncertain mama-mind by day. And through muffled sniffles by way of a tear-stained pillow each night.


You’ve weighed the options, time-and-time again, dearest mama.

On the one hand, you want him to stay with his circle of friends. His comfort zone. Whom he knows best. On the other hand, you know he will make new ones, maybe being able to even better-relate to a fresh set of friends, with an extra year of social skills.

On the one hand, he knows the basics. The alphabet. His sounds. His numbers. His shapes. On the other hand, he is still struggling. And, you know it in your depths of your heart, beautiful mama, if you give him that extra year, his confidence will only grow.

On the one hand, you are ready for one less schedule to juggle. One less bill to pay. One less round-trip to make each day. On the other hand, this is an opportunity to devour this precious growing being even more, beloved mama. A gift to you both. Completely priceless.

On the one hand, you want to embrace every moment of keeping him in the “now”, not causing added change. On the other hand, you fully understand that the most significant consideration is his future, knowing that is the greatest concern of your tugging-at-mama’s-heart decision.

Darling mama, please hear me, from a former-educator mama who has grappled through this decision now three times myself. If you are currently sitting on that old, rickety preschool-versus-kindergarten picket fence; teetering between the familiarity of another year of preschool and the heavy uncertainty of his readiness for kindergarten…

Choose the extra year.

It is so unbelieveably tough, beautiful friend. But, as an elementary teacher of a dozen years, and a mama to five little ones, I promise your aching heart…you will never regret the extra year.

The extra growth.

The social practice.

The bridge from memorization of his alphabet, to application in his newfound reading skills.

The extra 365 days to continue to build a confidence in him, that if you are being honest with yourself…and him…is not anywhere near 100%.

Sweet mama, there’s only one way to look at this…a complete and utter blessing. A chance to absorb these next twelve months with him. Inhaling these last moments of toddler-into-boyhood.

Digging for the worms.

Staying out of the hot lava.

Setting up the extra playdates.

Reading all the books. And then reading more.

All while knowing, you’re giving him a gift that will last a lifetime.


Ultimately, beautiful mama, the choice is yours. You know him best. You breathe life into him, day-in and day-out. But, if the question is even a thought in your mind...if it is something preventing you from finding a place of tranquility and peace..go with the extra year. I promise, you won’t regret it.

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